Perasaan Carca Merba

Assalamualaikum, dengan nama Allah, yang Maha Pemurah lagi Maha Penyayang,

Segala puji bagi Allah, Tuhan Sekalian Alam, dan Salawah ke atas junjungan besar Nabi Muhammad SAW.

Ya Allah,

Sesungguhnya Kau lah yang Maha Berkuasa,

Kau lah Penerima Segala Hajat,

Kau lah yang Maha Mengetahui,

Bantulah aku hambaMu yang lemah,

Aku pohon kepadaMu,

Bantulah aku hilangkan perasaan ini,

Sesungguhnya ia hadir tidak diundang,

Aku takut cintaku padaMu hanyut,

Ya Allah,

Aku masih belum bersedia,

Tapi Kau yang lebih mengetahui,

Aku serahkan masa depanku dalam perihalMu,

Dan aku akan berjuang sedaya upayaku,

Aku takut dikecewakan,

Aku tak mahu dipermainkan,

Aku khuatir ini permainan perasaan,

Aku takut bermain permainan hati ini,

Biarkan aku berlari,

Terus berlari,

Lari daripada semua ini,

Benarkan daku wahai Tuhanku,

Ya Allah, 

Andai dia jodohku,

Kau peliharalah aku dan dia,

Kau pertemukanlah kami dengan izinMu,

Kau ikatkan kami dalam ikatan yang sah dan Kau restui,

Kerna aku hambaMu yang lemah,

Kerna aku manusia biasa,

Kerna aku tiada apa2,

Kerna aku hina.

Sesungguhnya,

Engkaulah yang Menentukan,

Ampuni aku, Restui aku, Rahmati aku.

Serta Ibu Bapaku, ahli keluargaku,

Dan sahabat2 kenalan2ku,

Dan juga si dia.

Illaliqa. Wassalam.

Sin Cera,

SH

21/06/14

Bukit Indah, Ampang

Selangor, Malaysia.

p/s: though my results wasn't that good as I predicted, but alhamdulillah for passing. will do my master next year, insya-Allah.

pp/s: will start my travelog post of summer trip soon enough. thanks for your patience.

Final Bachelor Examination 2014.

Assalamualaikum, in the name of Allah, the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful,

All praise to Allah, the Supreme Ruler of the world, and Salawah upon The Last Prophet Muhammad PBUH.

I must say, confidence and tawakkal are two different concepts. Confidence is a state of where somebody is being certain that his action or words is the best or most effective. Tawakkal on the other hand, putting the confidence in God's decision, after pushing the effort to our best capabilities, believing that He will give the best result which suits us. 

Honestly speaking, in the mist of exam period, most of the time I don't have the confidence in answering the brutally horrifying question, however, I've put my tawakkal and pray to Allah, and always believe in Him would be my first priority after every paper. I'm not really good in reading and memorizing hundreds of lecture slides, like my high school biology test, mostly it didn't go well, and this exam, I've got laws and ethics, sustainability and engineering's principle to be bombed into this piece of brain of mine. 

But alhamdulillah, I'm doing my best and I know He will help me.

i need prayer and your encouragement. not pressure. thanks.

most of the time answering my paper. :(

Illaliqa'. Wassalam.

Random thoughts

Assalamualaikum, in the name of Allah, The Most Gracious, The Most Merciful,

All praise to Allah, the Ruler of this world, and salawah upon the Last Messenger Prophet Muhammad PBUH.

I recalled during my high school days, even the hardest time, the busiest moment, I will find myself back at the corner of the surau, and recite the Quran, at least once a day, how busy I am, I will go and pray at the surau. 

But nowadays, I hardly do that anymore, what happened to my time management? What is my time allocation for Allah? What will I do to please Him?

I can't say there's any improvement, but I'm trying. Let's strive towards His blessing. Insya-Allah.

Pray for my exams pretty please. 

Illaliqa'. Wassalam. 

Spring 2014: Istanbul Gezisi.

Assalamualaikum, in the name of Allah, the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful,

All praise to Him, the Ruler of the world, and salawah upon the Last Prophet Muhammad PBUH.

Last spring break, I had a small matter (read: hal sikit). I decided to go to Istanbul, in Turkey for a week as vacation alone. I rode turkish airlines which was very good airlines for about 3 hours and half to Attartuk Airport, Istanbul. I was reluctant to go at first as this is my first time going for eurotrip alone. Yes, I took the risk, but alhamdulillah, I survived for a week there. Since spring break last year, I've been longing to go to Istanbul, the place where Islamic empire, the Ottoman was once feared by the western. And so many things just didn't go to my way since then, I decided to take the leap of faith, of going alone, though my mom really against me.

"Sometimes we need to take a leap of faith. Just jump of the cliff, and pray that God will help you for sure, if your intentions are pure."

I stayed at Beyoglu area, about 2 minutes to Istiklal Cadesi and Hard Rock Cafe Istanbul. The hostel was named Seyyah Apartment and Hostel. The owner was very friendly and helpful. Even though I didn't get the room I asked for online, he transferred me to somewhere really comfortable, and I liked it. I met few awesome people in it. Johanna and Tristan were a couple from Hamburg, Germany, very friendly and kind. Mo Zheng from China, though studying in Portsmouth, very cute and friendly, Mathias from south Germany was kind and friendly and another one Australian girl working in London (I forgot her name), who was good and awesome. I wish to meet people like them more. May Allah bless these people with knowledge and wisdom of Islam.

Marmara Sea at the back.

I went to various places as below:

1. Aya Sophia

2. Blue Mosque

3. Topkapi Palace

4. Suleymaniye Mosque

5. Beyazid Mosque

6. Grand Bazaar

7. Spice Market

8. Eminonu

9. Eyub Sultan Mosque

10. Istanbul University

11. Dolmabahce Palace

12. Istiklal Cadesi

13. Turk Telekom Arena

14. Galata Tower

15. Kadikoy

16. Prince's Island

17. Anadolu Kavalagi

Blue Mosque, Sultanahmet, Istanbul.

Hagia Sophiea, Sultanahmet.

 Suleymaniye Mosque.

 New Mosque.

 Spice/Egyptian Bazaar.

 Eminonu

View from Galata Tower

I guess that were most of it. I met an old couple from Canada in front of Blue Mosque that were very friendly and even suggested me to go Cappadocia and Pamukkale. I really wish to go there, maybe somewhere in future, insya-Allah. I also met a Malay father and his small daughter in a mosque at A. Kavalagi. He was a doctor in HUKM and was on vacation since his wife is having a conference nearby. I wish these people will be blessed as well. Allah, how good these people.

I went to Eyub Sultan Mosque, the place where one of companions of Prophet Muhammad PBUH is buried in constantinople. It was very good opportunity that I got to go there and give my al-fatihah to the martyrs. Alhamdulillah and all praise to Allah for giving me this priceless chance. On the way back, I enjoyed the view which I can't get anywhere else, on top of the hill at the area. Alhamdulillah.

 Eyub.

Eyub Sultan Mosque

One good thing here is almost all the food are halal, which was heaven for me. I don't have to think much of what I want to eat because I can simply have anything, that included the fast food restaurant. I enjoy my time here, tasting free sample of turkish delight and baklava, walking without any rushing whatsoever, seeing the view of once a great place envisioned by the Prophet Muhammad PBUH.

Egg and minced meat pide.

Balik ekmek. 

Kumpir.

Burger King! Jyeah!

Tulips at Topkapi Palace.

On the last day, I went to blue mosque with Matthias to have the last glimpse of blue mosque and hagia sophie during twilight. It was really dramatic moment when I last sujud during my maghrib jamaah prayer there. It was great experience and I wish to come again to Istanbul. Maybe next time I'll go to Pamukkale and Cappadocia as well. It was unimaginable to think how sad it is to leave this country at the end of my solo journey.

Buyukada, Uskudar (Prince's Island)

And so, I made another video. Here it goes. :D

"O Lord, for You I give my thanks, for You I get my strength. Just this once, I want to express my gratitude to You, for this chance and safety upon this great land. Prosperous it and let the ray of Islam shine for eternity."

Alhamdulillah. Illaliqa'. Wassalam.

p/s: I'm having presentation and final exam in a week. Please spare me your prayer. Tesekkurler. :D

Buat Si A

Assalamualaikum, dengan nama Allah, yang Maha Pemurah lagi Maha Penyayang,

Segala puji bagi Allah, Tuhan sekalian alam, selawat kepada junjungan besar Nabi Muhammad SAW.

Kepada A,

Sesungguhnya apa yang saya sampaikan ini sudah lama terbuku di hati ini, dan saya harap anda membacanya dengan hati sentiasa berdoa kepada Allah.

A,

Jika saya katakan anda tidak cantik, maka saya telah menipu diri anda, dan juga seluruh dunia. Kerana andalah wanita paling cantik & tinggi budi pekerti pernah saya temui. Dan jika saya katakan saya tiada perasaan kepada anda walau secebis zarah, maka saya telah menipu diri sendiri, anda dan juga seluruh cakerawala. Kerana diri ini tidak dapat menahan pesona persismu dan hati ini hanya mampu menyimpan perasaan dan sanggup berdiam seribu bahasa daripada meluahkannya kepadamu.

A,

Namamu sering menjadi bual bicaraku bersama Tuhanku. Nama yang senantiasa dibaca dalam doaku, agar sentiasa diberi pelindung dan sentiasa berada dalam rahmat-Nya. Hanya Allah yang tahu bagaimana berombak hati ini jika perihal dirimu dapatku tahu.

Wahai A,

Kerana kecantikanmu, agamamu, kasih-sayang pada keluarga dan sahabatmu, imanmu terhadap Tuhanmu dan Rasul-Nya, saya tertarik kepada diri anda yg seindah bidadari terindah bak mawar berduri. Kerana kemuliaanmu, aku menjadi kecut, gentar, takut untuk menyampaikan hasratku kepadamu. Aku hanyalah insan biasa, hina dan kedana. Tidak layak untuk memiliki dirimu yang seperti intan permata di dalam bekas kaca. Aku hanyalah seperti pengemis jalanan yang melihat ke dalam bekas kaca itu.

A,

Sementara ini, aku dapat doakan yang terbaik buat dirimu dan kerabatmu. Semoga perasaan ini dapat menjadi penyunting semangat untuk lebih mendekatkan diri kepada Sang Pencipta. Aku juga doakan agar dikau berjaya dunia dan akhirat serta menjadi insan, umat, hamba, ibu dan isteri yang dirahmati Allah. Semoga kita dapat bertemu di lain waktu. Insya-Allah. Illaliqa'. Wassalam.

Sin Cera,

SH,

10/03/14,

South Bay, Scarborough,

North Yorkshire, England.

"One of the greatest test of faith is when things didn't turn out the way you wished for, but you still believe in His plan and say alhamdulillah."

P/s: Harap kepada sesiapa yang namanya bermula daripada A, seperti Athirah, Aqilah dan sebagainya, atau Aiman, Amirul mohon jangan terpanggil.

Pre-Spring 2014: Inspiring Much Portsmouth & Brighton

Assalamualaikum, in the Name of Allah, the Most Gracious the Most Merciful,

All praise to Him, the Supreme Ruler of the World, and Salawah upon the Last Messenger Muhammad PBUH.

I went to Portsmouth, south of England, to visit a company which involved in navy army, BAE system. Despite gained a lot of useful knowledge and experiences, I got new friends as well. Yeay. The Portsmouth harbour was beautiful and the outlet sells a lot of clothing. I'm sure will come here again. Hehe.

The next day, I decided to go to Brighton. The plan was last minute and I went alone. As soon as I got to the beach I lay down myself, admiring the scenery that unfolds before me. It's been a while since I last saw beach and I've been hoping to see one, thank Allah for giving me this rare opportunity a success. Alhamdulillah. I prayed on the pebble beach, and feeling gratitude to Allah for this splendid moment. The beach was very cold but the sun was very bright as well, mixing the air with warm winter blowing through my face. I laid myself on my back, staring to the sea, beach and sky, hardly imagine my last minute plan was awesome. Despite the chill winter weather, I spent about 2 hours for the beautiful view. Alhamdulillah.

On the 2 hours journey back to London, I met this old woman, Jane. She is 70 years old and still studying. She's doing her pHd on Shakespeare, wrote an introduction of 15000 words and this gave me a lot of insight. Study never has age limit! She told me that she can't spend her time without doing anything. She always need to do something or else she'll get bored. She went swimming, attending lectures and loves keeping her house tidy. She went to Brighton to visit her daughter. She rarely cooked but she used to know how to make Nasi Goreng. Yeah, she even said nasi goreng in Malay. We exchanged recipe on how to make nasi goreng and I share to her the locations of several Malaysian restaurant in Paddington and Chinatown. For 2 hours, I felt the conversation was inspiring and I never got bored. She sparked something inside me, motivate me to become better, filling my time wisely. She offered me a slice of cake which I finished it as I was very hungry (I only fill my tummy with oreos for lunch). I hope to see her again. Insya-Allah. May Allah bless her and guide her towards the Truth.

Jane and her shakespeare notes. She never knew anything about rice cooker, so I suggest her one.

'Life is never too old to learn something new eh?'

Later that night, I went to Faizal Tahir's performance, a charitable event for Syria, as a persuasion from syafiq, my awesome flatmate. It was good and met few of my friends. Also alhamdulillah for this opportunity.

I think that was all my weekend was well spent. Awesome friends, great moments and irreplacable blessing from Allah. Syukur. How was yours?

Illaliqa'. Wassalam. :)

Grace Which We Forgot

Assalamualaikum, in the name of Allah, the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful,

Praise be to Allah, the Cherisher and Sustainer of the Worlds, 

and Peace and Prayer upon the Final Prophet and Messenger, Muhammad PBUH.

('Abdullah Yusuf 'Ali)

In the midst of busy, distracted by assignments, pressure by projects,

We will be appreciate towards the things God gave us once or multiple times before,

The grace of leisure, free time.

We used to have all those times, but only few of us fully grasp the essence of times,
Exploit the times to the fullest, utilized it for utmost advantage, do things we really need to do,
Yet most people end up wasting it, just fooling around with it.

Certain people maybe need the times for several different purposes,
Resting, relaxing and perhaps studying for final, probably watching korean drama,
And if we asked ourselves, how much have we spare the leisure times for the sake of Allah?
Ouch, ouch and ouch.

For the moment, I really need the times to study,
Projects have taken quite the damage towards my leisure times,
And now, alhamdulillah, studying for finals is a bit fruitful,
Just a bit, it was nowhere near to the blossom of a big tree,
But I'm getting there, hopefully still got time for finals in april,
Insya-Allah, first class,
Pray for me and you and everyone, pretty please. :)

The one who said is nearer to the one who hear.

Good luck everyone sitting exams and exam-to-be,
All is well, May Allah be with you.
All the best to your medical exams. :D

thanks for your prayer in advance. jyeah!

The knowledge we earned up till now supposedly made us more humble to God and human being, despite whatever background you do possessed.

stop procastinating and start doing something.

Illaliqa'. Wassalam alaikum.